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And waiting for her words to appear on the small black screen of his telephone. ‘Door is open.’ But this night he remembered the key. And he left her alone in her bed, in her house, and used the key to lock the door behind himself. To leave her alone in her boundaries on this late Friday night. To leave her locked inside her feelings, and not to touch her. So he left. And he returned to where he was supposed to be, just as she had described it. Not to where he wanted to be. He left behind him, he left in that bed, the better part of himself. He left behind his soul and his desire, and just his body returned to where she said he had to go. The night was long as it was short. Only a few hours, but he could not sleep. Only a few hours, but they seemed more. The second hand on his clock, moving deliberately, and he could count each second. Seeing how sixty turned into one minute, and how each minute slowly turned one hour into the next. And all the while it was just his body, just his. When Mom had finished her story, I wrapped her in a hug that was not as big as the lump in my throat. I held her tighter than ever, suddenly afraid of losing her. I whispered ‘Mom, I understand and of course I forgive you. I am so sorry I hurt you. You are everything to me and all I could ever deserve. Thank you.’ After we had hashed it out, I felt better and life returned to near normal. I appreciated my mom in new ways, but I also hurt that she had felt she had to mislead me. But back to normal was better and things were better. I got involved in the couple of summer school classes I was taking and had my part time job, and things with mom were really better than ever. One day, it was a day off and I had nothing really special planned. I needed a new shirt for work, so I decided to go to the mall and just browse around in the air conditioning, rather than fight the summer heat wave. I found the exact shirt I needed and wanted at the second store I tried and I thought I might just.
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